Arcadia Imperial Stout

Arcadia Imperial Stout
Arcadia Brewing Co.
Battle Creek, Michigan

Hi, I don't care about this review so I'm going to wing it with even less forethought than normal. Remember back in the day when you were congested and mom would put you at the sink with a towel covering your head and the hot water on low so as to create steam and loosen up your blockage? Yes, and then she'd rub some Vick's on your chest and you'd feel like all of the clogged membranes were opening up as if a spring thaw had struck the perma-frosted dried up and caked phlegm in your nasal cavities. This is like that but on your throat and lungs. A spray can of dark whip cream lit with a blow torch until your marshmallow tongue is slightly charred but not burnt to a crisp. Suck on a cold raisin, frisbee boy, and call in the dogs early because after a few of these you're going to bump into everything including your shadow while shuffling through the tight confines of your dark ass kаза́ки́ living room, Sergei. Chtob vse byli zdorovy!

-Wörtwurst